meritocracy

Parents do a lot for their children in Singapore.

Many go to great lengths to secure places for their kids in coveted primary schools and send them for private tutoring. Such competitiveness means that families spend more and more time and money, just to outdo each other.

More recently, the north-east region has witnessed the proliferation of “dedicated enrichment zones”. These have now expanded their offerings to cater to pre-school children, opening up a new frontier in the educational arms race.

As a mother of two young children myself, I’ve been in countless conversations with other parents about schools and extracurricular activities. In my experience, while most parents would personally agree with Prime Minister Lawrence Wong’s assessment that the definition of success should go beyond academic and material achievements, many may nevertheless choose to stick to the old formula when it comes to their own children.

Yet amidst all the competition, many are unhappy with having to be more kiasu, literally “fearful of losing”, than one would otherwise like to be.

A culture of hyper-competitiveness

So what exactly are parents fearful of?

Perhaps the most obvious answer is that parents fear seeing their children at the bottom of the heap in a system that concentrates rewards at the top. To get up there, one must outperform peers in assessments from classroom to workplace.

In the past, parents would receive school report cards that clearly indicated a student’s exact ranking in class as determined by exams that started as early as Primary 1. This information, which indicated how far a student was from the top, likely compelled some families to get more heavily involved.

Today, primary and secondary school students no longer have to sit mid-year examinations, and the youngest would also be spared from testing until Primary 3. Moreover, starting this year, academic streaming has been removed in secondary schools in favour of subject-based banding. By diversifying from the use of single metrics, these moves have reined in the stressful practice of student ranking.

Although these institutional shifts can take some of the edge off the pressure on parents, some families have got around them by sending their children for mock examinations at private centres. Similarly, when primary school registration rules were amended in 2021 to double the number of places reserved for the most competitive phase, parents’ chat groups and forums immediately discussed strategies to get ahead of the competition.

These responses suggest changes to the educational system and rules can do only so much. As long as parents feel that some schools and pathways are more prestigious than others, they will continue to feel the pressures of a hyper-competitive culture.

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Parental obligation and uncertainty

One reason that parents are so competitive is that they feel their children are vulnerable and depend upon them to provide help and guidance. Driven by a sense of duty, they find it difficult to defy crowd wisdom because, in future, they might be accused of being irresponsible parents. This also accords them with the moral authority to override any childish protestations as the adult “voice of reason”. The forces at play are especially intense if the stakes are determined at younger ages.

Another problem is that parents have to take decisions today without full information on their children’s future preferences. Uncertain where their children’s passions will lie and what their material aspirations will look like, parents are more likely to avoid risky choices in favour of safer options, which is doing what everyone else is doing.

These dynamics restrict the choice sets of parents, often at the cost of the well-being of the students themselves. Stress levels among Singaporean children have increased and academics play a big part. This is likely linked to why children have been reporting more mental health issues, with one study estimating that children lose 24 days of school per year on average due to depression or anxiety symptoms.

While experts warn that busy parents may not detect issues or be equipped to provide support for their children’s mental health, a separate set of risks also arises from the opposite direction, where overly intensive parenting leads to anxiety and weakens the ability to face failure among children.

Some parents may feel that these costs are worth it if it means that their children will have a brighter future. But it doesn’t make sense to pursue something at all costs, and yet take a naive and uncritical view of the expected gains, which can be very far from what is imagined as to how far they actually go towards fulfilment and well-being. A culture centred on academic performance and failing to properly value children’s holistic development leads us to short-change ourselves and our loved ones.

Making merit less about relative performance

Apart from academic ability, we need to focus on skills and competencies that contribute towards a child’s holistic development while tamping down excessive competitiveness in a merit-based society.

These must meet two criteria. First, they need to be highly desired by future employers, colleagues and society at large. Second, they need to be observable, measurable and yet, relative to academic performance, less given to competitive pressures that can spill over to parents.

Such competencies should also be independent of socioeconomic background. This can help bolster the institution of meritocracy as an underlying governing principle. This has come under increased scrutiny as some feel the odds of accumulating merit are stacked against the disadvantaged, who are further made to feel undeserving.

What fits the bill are pro-social skills that include diligence, resilience, honesty, humility, kindness, and desire to keep learning and contributing to the community. These attributes are not only highly sought after in professional settings, but necessarily involve individual autonomy and value identification. They also place the onus of learning, as it should be, on the students rather than on their parents.

Moral striving and contributing to the common good are also non-competitive and less dependent on family background, bringing us closer to a fair society, where everyone can make good, regardless of socioeconomic status.

This is in contrast with technical competencies, which are also important, but where not everyone can be a top achiever. By logical implication, the flip side of acknowledging that every child has unique gifts, is that there will be some advantages and talents that not every child possesses.

A broader concept of merit that is more within everyone’s reach can lower stress, improve mental health and embolden individuals to pursue personal interests and strengths. It also promotes proper societal functioning through greater belonging, cohesion, and increased propensity to take calculated risks.

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Arriving at a social consensus

If a decisive shift in parenting culture is to happen, a social consensus is needed. What can help accelerate this process is to increase recognition of the trend towards a softer approach to child development, in which families increasingly care about character and socio-emotional development, and where building environments of support, trust and openness is prioritised.

If such a consensus is reached, parents will not feel compelled to enter the educational race at the expense of their children’s well-being, just because they mistakenly think that’s what everyone else is also doing.

By shifting the bar for merit in the classroom from achievement for personal gain to include contributions to the community, we make it something which everyone, not just the few, can reach.

Tan Poh Lin is a senior research fellow at the Institute of Policy Studies, Lee Kuan Yew School of Public Policy, National University of Singapore.

get that spot before o level result

SINGAPORE – When Hemavarshnee Saravanan was in Secondary 4, she started a hair accessories business with a friend to sell scrunchies in school-approved colours.

“Students want to look as cute as possible, but it was hard to do that with school rules. So we decided to sell white or green hair ties to give students more options instead of just using black rubber bands,” says the former St Margaret’s Secondary student.

The hair accessories business lasted just 10 months until she had to prepare for her O-level exams. But it sealed her decision to study business and apply to Ngee Ann Polytechnic (NP) via the early admissions exercise (EAE).

“Since I already knew I wanted to get into a business course, I might as well secure a place through the EAE,” says the 19-year-old. She is now a third-year diploma student in business studies.

The EAE is an aptitude-based admissions exercise that allows students to apply for and receive conditional admission offers to polytechnics before receiving their final grades.

According to the Ministry of Education, applications and admissions via the polytechnic EAE have remained relatively consistent over the past three years. About 13,500 students applied for the polytechnic EAE in 2023 for admission in 2024, and 5,500 received an offer.

The EAE is open to graduating O-Level students, final-year Nitec and Higher Nitec students from the Institute of Technical Education (ITE). Polytechnics have the flexibility to select and admit students based on their aptitude and interest.

For more information on the EAE, go to eae.polytechnic.edu.sg or check out the websites of the polytechnics.

Lasalle College of the Arts is offering this admission route for the first time in 2024 for all 11 of its diploma programmes for the August 2025 intake. The programmes include diplomas in fine arts, design, media arts and performing arts. Applications close on May 24.

The Nanyang Academy of Fine Arts (Nafa) also accepts students via EAE. More information is available on the websites of the two arts institutions.

How to boost your chances through write-ups and interviews

The EAE is a holistic assessment of what an applicant has done so far. This means students should go the extra mile and find opportunities and activities related to their field to be considered favourably, says Ms Jeanne Liew, principal of Republic Polytechnic (RP).

She adds that the EAE route is suitable for students who know their interests or what they want to pursue as their career.

“They must possess the passion, aptitude and positive attitude towards a field related to their desired polytechnic course,” says Ms Liew.

She adds that in the last three years, RP has seen a year-on-year increase in the total number of O-level applicants who put RP as their first choice.

The application consists of two components: a 600-character course-specific write-up to assess the applicant’s aptitude and interest for his or her selected course, and an optional 1,000-character write-up about one’s talents and achievements.

Ms Liew strongly encourages students to do the optional write-up.

“Showcase non-academic achievements to boost one’s chances. This could include leadership roles, community involvement programmes, national awards, businesses or an IT programme that they have developed,” she says.

NP’s deputy principal, Ms Looi Mei Fong, advises students to approach both write-ups as if they were pitches.

“The stronger the evidence presented, the easier it is for us to shortlist the applicant for an interview,” she says.

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Students shortlisted for an interview would need to prepare a portfolio showcasing relevant works, certificates or documents.

They should also familiarise themselves with the assessment criteria and stay updated on industry trends. For example, if a child is keen on a diploma in information technology, he can read up news on artificial intelligence (AI), generative AI or careers in the information and communications technology industry.

“This will allow him to engage in a meaningful conversation with his interviewers,” says Ms Looi.

The assessment modes could range from taking an aptitude test to delivering an individual pitch to a group interview to assess teamwork or emotional intelligence.

They may need to respond to scenario-based questions or complete an activity to demonstrate their analytical, critical thinking and communication skills, as well as their awareness of current affairs.

For instance, applicants for the diploma in biomedical science may encounter questions that give them the opportunity to discuss research in diseases and drugs that have been in the news.

“While students will not be expected to have technical knowledge, those who are able to discuss such news with confidence are more likely to stand out,” says Ms Looi.

Mr Sng Choon Leng, director of academic affairs at Temasek Polytechnic, says interviewers are keen to find out about applicants’ interest in a course and how they had pursued this passion.

For example, students could share if they had read up on related topics, participated in training courses, or done some part-time work or community service.

RP’s Ms Liew adds: “Don’t be shy to share about past events and activities that you participated in.”

Miss Jolene Chong, 20, graduated in May with a diploma in applied AI and analytics from Nanyang Polytechnic (NYP). She shared during the EAE interview that she was involved in freelance work during her secondary school days, developing websites from scratch for clients from a job portal.

Miss Jolene Chong, 20, who graduated in May with a diploma in applied AI and analytics from Nanyang Polytechnic, entered the institution through the early admissions exercise. PHOTO: NANYANG POLYTECHNIC

“It gave me something else to talk about beyond my leadership experience, and also showed my interest in the field,” she says.

Her preparations for the interview paid off.

“I asked about one of the projects that the school was developing and the interviewers seemed impressed,” adds Ms Chong.

She topped her diploma programme with a 4.0 GPA and will be studying computer science at the National University of Singapore.

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How parents can guide their child

Parents play an important role in helping their children discover and nurture their aptitudes and passions, says Mr Wee Hau Yap, acting director at the department of academic services at Singapore Polytechnic.

He encourages parents to familiarise themselves with the EAE process, eligibility criteria and available courses to better advise their child.

Parents can also initiate conversations with their child to help him or her discover which way he or she learns best.

Mr Russell Chan, principal of NYP, says parents should ask if their child prefers applied learning or theoretical learning, which is the key difference between a polytechnic and junior college education.

He also suggests that they attend the parents’ seminars held by polytechnics.

“Every polytechnic has its unique selling point and culture. Visit them to experience the feel of the institution and various schools within, and ask questions about the syllabus, teaching model and culture,” says Mr Chan.

He added that four out of the eight NYP Distinguished Award winners at the 2024 graduation ceremonies joined the polytechnic through the EAE.

At NP, five out of the 10 top graduates in 2024 entered via the EAE.

NP’s Ms Looi says parents could consider if their child has the right skills and inner drive to succeed.

“Delve deeper into your child’s motivations, as this will sustain them on their journey towards their dream careers,” she adds.

If a child already has an idea of what he or she wants to pursue, parents can help him or her narrow down his or her options and match them to specific diploma courses.

Ms Looi says it is important to look beyond the course names, to read the course descriptions and module details, and to understand how they will learn.

“Some courses offer a project-based curriculum, while others provide longer, real-world experiences outside of campus,” she says.

Mr Nur Aziman Rostam, 23, entered RP through the EAE and recently graduated with a diploma in sport coaching. He had the chance to do a six-month internship as an assistant football coach from October 2023 at the Bangkok FC Academy in Thailand.

Mr Nur Aziman Rostam guiding a young trainee during his assistant football coach internship at the Bangkok FC Academy in Thailand. PHOTO: COURTESY OF NUR AZIMAN ROSTAM

“Coaching in Bangkok was a very enjoyable experience and I learnt a lot from international coaches about planning each training session,” he says.

He credits his father, Mr Rostam Mohd Hashim, 56, a driver, for introducing him to a variety of sports since he was young.

“My dad triggered my love for sports. I started with soccer, then badminton and canoeing,” said Mr Aziman, who represented Singapore in handball at the SEA Games and Asian Men’s Handball Championship.

He studied fitness training and sport management at ITE before his mentor at the school suggested that he apply to RP.

Despite his busy schedule of studies, part-time work and national handball team duties the past few years, Mr Aziman says he is excited to move closer to his dream of becoming a handball coach.

Mr Nur Aziman Rostam (centre, foreground) taking part in the Men’s Handball Competition at the 2022 SEA Games in Vietnam. PHOTO: NUR AZIMAN ROSTAM

Currently waiting for national service enlistment, he says: “Training six times a week was tiring, but I told myself to trust the process and work towards my goal.”

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plwd biasses

As society ages, efforts are afoot to enable seniors to live dignified and meaningful lives. But ageism – prejudices based on a person’s chronological age – remains entrenched. While ageism in the workplace is not uncommon, is there ageism in healthcare too?

Patient A was a 78-year-old man with mild dementia. A degenerative spine disease meant that he also needed assistance in daily activities.

He was referred to a colleague for consideration for bile duct (biliary) stones, given his recurrent bouts of biliary infection. However, he was told that he was too frail for the endoscopic procedure and that the risks outweighed the potential benefits.

Patient B, with moderate-stage dementia, was treated for pneumonia. She had been physically well and mobile before she was hospitalised. But the attending team told her son that if the 82-year-old woman turned seriously ill, she would not be offered treatment in the critical care unit as her advanced age and dementia would render her unlikely to survive, even with intensive care.

Evidence of bias

There is both anecdotal and published evidence that seniors tend to receive less evidence-based treatments on account of their age and apparent frailty. The World Health Organisation’s 2021 Global Report On Ageism highlighted the lesser known yet widespread impact of ageism on quality of care for seniors. One study found doctors were quicker to write up do-not-resuscitate orders for patients aged over 75, regardless of clinical prognosis.

A close corollary to ageism is dementia-ism, where people living with dementia (PLWDs) are discriminated against. PLWDs have been known to receive lower rates of general health screenings and surgery consultations, and are less likely to be considered for intensive care.

In a large cohort study published in 2023 by Age And Ageing, the journal of the British Geriatrics Society, the one-year survival rate of PLWDs following a critical care admission was similar to that observed in general older populations.

Decisions not to offer resuscitative treatment to frail seniors are often justified on grounds of futility. Similarly, when treatments are assessed to carry a greater risk of harm than benefit, they are typically not recommended.

It is not unreasonable to construe that treatment will be futile in situations where patients are clearly in an advanced state of frailty or dementia. It is more challenging to decide on appropriate intervention in cases of less severe frailty or dementia.

Hence, treatment decisions depend on how futility is determined. An intervention can be deemed futile either because it has little likelihood of succeeding or because it may add little to quality of life.

Such decisions, underpinned by clinical experience, knowledge and personal values, are also susceptible to biases. It has been shown that when doctors are under time pressure, they are more vulnerable to implicit biases towards disadvantaged groups such as frail seniors and PLWDs.

But to base treatment decisions on age or subjective appraisals of frailty does not stand up to scrutiny. Even as patient A was assessed to be frail because his spine condition limited his mobility and independence, he did not suffer from conditions such as heart disease or stroke that would heighten the risk of adverse outcomes from endoscopy.

Similarly, patient B was denied intensive care on account of her advanced age and dementia.

The attending medical team could have unwittingly based their judgment on ableism – the notion that the value and quality of life of a person with a disability, such as dementia, is so low that medical intervention would be too burdensome and hence not worthwhile.

But such an approach could mean that older patients and those with dementia can be discriminated against. How can we prevent that?

Imbalance of power

We would do well to first consider, as a default, well-evidenced and standard-of-care treatment, even for frail seniors and PLWDs. A patient’s age or cognitive function should not be the foremost consideration.

Instead, treatment decisions should rest on the tenets of research evidence, a patient’s state and circumstances, a patient’s preferences, and clinical expertise. Securing the patient’s best interests after carefully weighing all factors is what matters, especially whether the modality of treatment is appropriate and proportionate to the desired outcome.

In the case of patient A, you’d weigh the slight chance of adverse outcomes from the endoscopic procedure against the benefit of resolving the recurrent biliary infections which would inevitably lead to eventual death.

In situations of clinical ambiguity, such as the case of patient B wherein the benefits of intensive care may be uncertain, time-limited trials of treatment can be considered.

It involves an agreement between the attending team and patients or their families to undertake treatment for a predetermined time period. The treatment can be withdrawn if certain pre-defined outcomes are not attained.

This balances the benefits and burdens of treatment, and affords time for the situation to evolve and bring about greater clarity.

In the case of patient B, the decision was taken largely based on the attending team’s opinion, which could have been influenced by ageism. There would be greater equity if the patient and her family could weigh in with their preferences.

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However, power asymmetry between doctors and patients remains. While patients can choose not to undergo a treatment offered, they cannot insist on treatments that are judged by doctors to be of no benefit.

The patients and their families are supposed to make informed decisions, but these decisions are still liable to being nudged by choice architecture – the way choices are presented. 

Moreover, when the attending team does not recommend a particular treatment option, it is unlikely that the patients and their families will want to take it up. In the case of patient A, this would mean not undergoing the endoscopic procedure that might have potentially benefited the patient.

Ableism, ageism and dementia-ism are real, and even seniors may devalue their own lives. To combat this, a whole-of-society approach is necessary. This would entail emphasising the dignity and intrinsic value of people beyond utility. We have to transcend the divides between the old and young, and the able and disabled.

Intergenerational mingling can help, as would initiatives such as the NUS Longitudinal Patient Experience. This offers students in healthcare-related disciplines the opportunity to journey with seniors over time to foster greater empathy and appreciation of the lived experience of seniors.

In his timely ST Forum letter, emeritus consultant Quah Thuan Chong lamented the lack of love in medical practice. Love, according to philosopher and theologian Thomas Aquinas, involves willing the good of the other.

Treatment decisions involving frail seniors and PLWDs are often complex, nuanced and multivalent. It behoves us to navigate them with wisdom, humility and love, so that no one is discriminated against.

Philip Yap is the chairman of Dementia Singapore. Gabriel Wong is a volunteer and Jason Foo is the chief executive officer of the same organisation.

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property rich cash poor

It’s all very well buying a second property to help fund your retirement, but if you deplete your savings in the process and leave yourself without enough cash to meet expenses, you could be forced to sell the property – a fate that befell one couple here recently.

The couple had owned a condo unit for over 10 years while they still lived in their HDB flat.

The property was rented out, but the income was not enough to live on and they had to sell it in 2023 to reap much-needed cash. It was during the sale process that they discovered a relative had staked a claim on the $1.3 million in proceeds.

While the claim was dismissed by the High Court, the couple’s predicament shows that having an extra property is not a done deal for retirement if buying it depletes your savings.

Another couple featured in Invest recently were caught in a bind when interest rates started rising in recent years.

They had also bought a private apartment with the hope of earning rental income, and continued to live in their Housing Board flat. But soaring interest rates meant most of the rental income went into servicing the mortgage, so there was not much left over for their own expenses.

To make matters worse, they did not plan for medical care and so were hard-pressed to pay for such expenses. They were unable to ask their grown-up children for more support because the children had their own families and expenses to worry about.

As a result, the couple had no choice but to rent out two bedrooms in their HDB flat to supplement their income.

Here are three things you should know before putting your money into an extra property.

1. Recurring costs

If you buy a private home, you will not receive any government subsidy to help you defray property-related costs. This means you have to meet maintenance fees that can be up to a couple of thousand dollars a quarter.

If the estate’s common facilities need fixing or replacing, the costs come from the residents’ “sinking fund”, which must be topped up if it is running low.

If you are late with maintenance payments, you will face high interest charges that could hit 20 per cent or more. There is also the higher property tax to consider if you are not living in the unit.

2. Rental income

You cannot spend your rental income without considering the costs of being landlords. In addition to taxes on such income, you may also have to pay expenses related to the replacement of appliances and maintenance cost.

If your unit has a mortgage, a large portion of the rent is likely to go towards monthly repayments.

Make sure you do your sums properly and that you can still service the loan, even without the rental income, because there is no guarantee that you will always find a tenant.

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3. Sustainable lifelong income

If your purpose in buying another property is to fund your retirement, you should first consider the benefits offered by CPF Life, which offers a better and “cheaper” option to get lifelong income.

From 2025, those reaching 55 can opt to join the national annuity scheme at its highest tier, by topping up their Retirement Account to the new Enhanced Retirement Sum of $426,000. This will provide up to $3,300 monthly from the age of 65.

So couples who plan together can enjoy a lifelong income of over $6,000 a month, tax- and fuss-free, by setting aside about $850,000.

Those who are older can also top up to the new sum, but their monthly payouts will be lower as they will start receiving them earlier than the cohort in 2025. Use the CPF Life Estimator online tool to check your numbers.

Just remember that it is always smarter to plan for continuous cash flows that come without any fuss because the task of managing assets will become more burdensome when you are older.

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no tech for 1 year

SYDNEY – The handwritten letters from our 13-year-old daughter sit on our coffee table in a clear plastic folder.

With their drawings of pink flowers and long paragraphs marked with underlined and crossed-out words, they are an abridged, analogue version of her spirited personality – and a way for my wife, Diana, and me to keep her close as we watch TV and fiddle with our mobile phones.

They would not exist, of course, if Amelia were home with us in Sydney. But she is hundreds of kilometres away at a uniquely Australian school in the bush, where she is spending her whole ninth-grade school year without the Internet, a phone, a computer or even a camera with a screen.

Our friends and relatives in the United States can hardly believe this is even a possibility. There, it is considered bold just to talk about taking smartphones from students during class time.

Here in Australia, a growing number of respected schools lock up smart everything for months. They make tap-and-swipe teens learn, play and communicate only through real-life interaction or words scrawled on the page.

“What a gift this is,” we told Amelia, when she was accepted, hesitated, then decided to go.

What I underestimated was how hard it would be for us at home. Removing the liveliest member of our family, without calls or texts, felt like someone had taken one of my internal organs across state lines without telling me how to heal.

Yet, as we adjust, her correspondence and ours – traveling hundreds of kilometres, as if from one era to another – are teaching us all more than we had imagined. The gift of digital detox that we thought Australia was giving our daughter has also become a revelatory bequest for us – her American parents and her older brother.

Something in the act of writing, sending and waiting days or weeks for a reply, and in the physical and social challenges experienced by our daughter at a distance, is changing all of our personal operating systems. Without the ever-present immediacy of digital connection, even just temporarily, can a family be rewired?

Amelia is at Timbertop, the ninth-grade campus of Geelong Grammar, one of Australia’s oldest private schools, which has made outdoor education a priority since the 1950s.

The idea was to build courage, curiosity and compassion among adolescents, and their ranks have ranged from the children of sheep farmers and diplomats, as well as Britain’s King Charles III. He spent a semester at Timbertop in 1966 and later said it was “by far the best part” of his education.

The year is meant to be difficult.

Before we dropped Amelia off in late January, we received a video from Timbertop showing teachers sitting at picnic tables in the sun, warning that confidence and personal growth would come only with struggles and perseverance.

Within 24 hours, we started to understand what that meant. Not for Amelia. For me and Diana.

A few days in, I also could not avoid tough questions about myself. Was the fact that it was so hard to lose contact a comment on my over-involved parenting? My own ridiculous addiction to tech-fuelled immediacy? Or both?

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“Withdrawal” was a word we heard discussed in Timbertop, or “TT”, circles.

In Amelia’s first letter, arriving after a week that felt like a year, we could certainly see the symptoms. She was anxious about friendships, wanting them to form as quickly as they do on Snapchat.

In her Timbertop interview, when asked about homesickness, she had bluntly said “that is the least of my worries”, but, in fact, Amelia missed us – even her brother. Her early letters to us and to him made clear that she found the intensity of her emotions surprising.

Diana and I wrote back right away with encouragement.

The experiences Amelia told us about, including the occasional mention of a class in positive psychology to identify personal strengths, spoke to the importance of play and pushing adolescents into environments where they can learn they are far more capable of managing risks and taking on tough tasks than they (or we) might think.

But I was also starting to find value in the retelling, in the slow sharing of our lives by analogue means – in the letter writing itself.

Seeking more insight, I reached out to John Marsden, former head of the English department at Timbertop and a best-selling young adult novelist who later founded his own experiential learning school north of Melbourne, Australia.

He laughed when I asked about the meaning of letters. “It’s been happening for thousands of years,” he said. “It is just new for this generation.”

He went on to suggest that what I was discovering in our letters might, in fact, be something significant – what he often tells parents they should aim for in their own families, in their own ways.

He called it a “gradual divergence”.

Amelia’s experience involves not just the luxury of removal – the taking away of social media. It also includes an addition, something the letters capture and embody: the gift of agency.

Far from home at 13, in a messed-up world, she has landed where there is intellectual space and the means to practise a method for asserting and exploring who she is and wants to become. She has found a room of one’s own.

I am tempted to send her a letter detailing my discovery. Maybe this time, I will write it by hand. Better yet, maybe I will let her tell me what she thinks when she gets the urge. NYTIMES

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water

SINGAPORE – Wet weather and cloudy skies provided Singapore some relief recently, but this does not mean your children should put away their water bottles.

Rain or shine, it is important to stay hydrated and it is not just to keep one from feeling thirsty, says dietitian Chong Yan Fong from the Nutrition and Dietetics Department at KK Women’s and Children’s Hospital (KKH).

A fun fact to share with your kids is that 70 per cent of the human body is made up of water.

When they do not drink enough fluids, they can struggle to concentrate and stay alert in class, which affects their learning. They are also likely to feel more tired and irritable, she adds.

In some cases of mild dehydration, they may feel more thirsty, have dry mouth or skin and suffer from headaches and constipation.

Ms Chong points out that water – the main property of blood – is essential to help carry nutrients and oxygen to cells in the body, support the immune system, digest food and flush out waste materials.

The body loses water throughout the day and it should be replaced constantly, even on breezy days or when a person is not exercising.

During rainy weather, most people tend to feel less thirsty as it seems that the body does not need water to cool itself down.

“But your body is still losing moisture. Not drinking water or drinking less because you do not feel thirsty increases the risk of dehydration,” she says.

If fluids are not replenished in time, dehydration can progress from mild to severe, leading to rapid breathing, increased heart rate, dizziness, seizures and loss of consciousness.

Parents and caregivers should be mindful to get the younger ones, who cannot verbalise if they are thirsty, to drink regularly, especially if they are sick or out in the heat playing.

Children are more prone to dehydration, as their bodies are not as efficient at cooling down as those of adults. Encourage them to take water breaks every 20 to 30 minutes when they are active outdoors.

How much water should kids drink?

The amount of fluids that children need daily depends on various factors such as age, weight and physical activity levels.

They may also need to drink more when they are ill, for example, when there is severe vomiting or diarrhoea, and when they take certain prescribed medications such as diuretics.

Generally, the colour of kids’ urine can help determine if they are drinking enough.

“If they are urinating several times a day and the urine is pale and odourless, it is a good indication that they are well hydrated,” Ms Chong says. “Medium-dark yellow urine which smells suggests they need to drink more water.”

While needs vary between individuals, here is a recommendation of how much fluids a healthy child should take daily. One cup is 250ml.

One to two years old: four to six cups

Three to six years old: five to seven cups

Seven to 12 years old: seven to nine cups

13 to 18 years old: nine to 12 cups

Adults: eight to 10 cups 

Sugar-sweetened beverages, including bubble tea and sports drinks, are best avoided. They are not as effective at hydrating your body, do not provide nutrition and can contribute to excess weight gain and tooth decay.

“Encourage your children to choose water instead of sugary drinks. It is extremely important to adopt healthy eating habits from young,” Ms Chong says.

But what if your kids do not like the taste of water? Here are five simple and healthy ways to encourage and increase their fluid intake.

1. Infused water

Add fruit to water to give it a boost of vitamins, minerals and antioxidants. PHOTO: PIXABAY

Add natural flavours to water by adding fruit, vegetables or herbs that your children like.

Try different combinations of ingredients to give water a boost of vitamins, minerals and antioxidants.

For example, try adding sliced strawberries and basil leaves; cucumber, mint and lime; grapefruit, orange and rosemary; or passion fruit and pineapple. Serve the beverage chilled.

2. Frozen fruity cubes

Freeze diced fresh fruit or 100 per cent fruit juice with no added sugar, and add the cubes to a cup of water.

The cubes give the water a hint of fruity flavour and provide small amounts of vitamin C. The variety of colours will also entice children to drink up.

3. Yogurt fruit popsicles

Add diced fresh fruit into small containers or popsicle moulds, fill with plain low- or non-fat yogurt and transfer to the freezer until set.

An alternative method is to puree your choice of fruit – for example, berries, banana or mangoes – with yogurt and divide them evenly into the moulds before freezing.

Get creative with your children and involve them in the preparation.

These popsicles will not only cool them down, but also offer a good mix of protein, vitamins, minerals and probiotics.

4. Fresh fruit

Offer fruit such as watermelon, oranges, peaches, papaya, pineapples and strawberries, which have high water content.

Whole fruit has fibre, vitamins and minerals. It is preferable to fruit juices which contain concentrated sugars and less fibre. Fruit juices can also be acidic, which can increase the risk of tooth decay.

If your children crave juices, look for those labelled with no added sugars or are freshly squeezed. Consider diluting them with water to reduce the acidity and sugar content.

5. Milk

Calcium is the key building block for strong, healthy bones and teeth, and is especially important during childhood and teenage years.

Low-fat milk as well as unsweetened, calcium-fortified dairy alternatives such as soya, oat and almond milks are good calcium sources.

Drinking milk is a good way to ensure adequate calcium and fluid intake.

Enjoy it chilled to beat the heat. Depending on your child’s age and needs, include two to three cups of milk a day as part of a balanced diet.

However, milk-based beverages containing added sugars, such as malted drinks, milkshakes, smoothies and iced chocolate, should be limited.

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Sun protection a must, regardless of weather

Apply sunscreen with an SPF level of at least 30 and broad spectrum protection when heading outdoors with your child. PHOTO: ST FILE

Sunscreen is not just for sunny days. You and your child should apply it even when the weather is cool as the sun’s harmful ultraviolet (UV) rays can still cause damage.

“Being geographically located one degree from the Equator, Singapore receives a large amount of sunlight throughout the year,” says Associate Professor Mark Koh, head and senior consultant from KKH’s Department of Dermatology.

UV radiation is a part of the sunlight spectrum and is made up of three parts – UVA, UVB and UVC.

UVA and UVB can reach Earth in significant amounts, as opposed to UVC, which is mostly absorbed by the ozone layer.

Prolonged exposure to UV rays can lead to sunburn and cause premature skin ageing.

In the long run, frequent sunburns are known to increase the risk of developing melanoma, a cancerous type of mole, as well as other forms of skin cancer.

Apart from its effects on the skin, excessive long-term sun exposure can lead to eye problems, such as cataracts, and suppression of the immune system, which reduces the body’s ability to fight infections.

Prof Koh says sun protection should ideally start at birth.

Infants below six months old should not be exposed to direct sunlight, as sunscreens are generally not indicated to be used on them.

Babies older than six months need sun protection measures when they go outdoors. Choose a sunscreen with SPF level of at least 30 and with broad spectrum protection that covers UVA and UVB rays. Reapply it every 30 to 60 minutes.

If your child’s skin turns red and itchy after using sunscreen, it is best to consult a doctor.

During extreme hot weather, children with eczema should avoid going outdoors as excessive sweating can irritate their skin condition.

Prof Koh says they can take short cool baths twice daily, but avoid using harsh soaps and bubble baths. Follow up with applying moisturiser.

To further relieve the itch, consider using a moisturiser that contains low concentrations of menthol or place the moisturiser in the fridge.

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Muhammad Fathullah Asfa Muhammad (Rmps) <muhammad_fathullah_asfa_muhammad@students.edu.sg>